Sweet-Bitter Thoughts

So holidays are over. And, well, my quite long work stint is over as well. So am back in school, which is surprisingly not bad. I do feel sort of lost though. Given that I took the last term off and the new freshman have invaded campus, I keep thinking "Wow, I seem to know so few people" and "Why are these new students everywhere and creating such a ruckus?” It’s irritating and distracting. I guess it’s a sign of being a senior.

It’s nice to have a student’s routine again though. Work meant getting up really early and slogging till really late - everyday. Now I have a four day weekend.....whee.....and though all my classes are the early morning ones I don’t really mind as they are terribly interesting. It’s kinda nice to be a student, there’s so much to learn and I always feel I know so little that there’s a perpetual motivation to read more, learn more, discuss, debate and I love that. It was something I missed while working. I also love the fact that I have some absolutely wonderful professors this term, even though I often feel incredibly dumb around them!

Also, after my month at home, where reading was negligible, I now have access to the library and gazillion books. That makes me happy. Am currently reading Calvino and Shakespeare.
So, everything’s rosy right now. But given the super heavy courses I am taking this term I guess it’s only a matter of time before the work load turns nightmarish. Anyway, till then everything’s good.

Leaving home was bitter sweet. The stay was good in the sense of sleeping till late and eating till I felt my stomach would burst, but non eventful otherwise.
It was also frustrating in terms of what was happening in the country. The Bombay blasts had just happened. Mulayam Singh Yadav gave SIMI a clean chit which was further affirmation (if we really needed any) of the fact that the politics in the country is reaching new levels of utter rot. Then the blog ban - such idiocy. Opening the newspapers and reading of Naxalite violence almost everyday. The security threats around Independence Day. I think it was the first time I actually had to think twice before going out to a crowded market place. It was startling that I was thinking that way and terribly upsetting.

Given the situation within the country (and I have to say here that though I do have tremendous respect for our PM, I feel the current government has fallen woefully short of any expectations I had from it) not mention the madness that’s going on in the world I think things are going to get much worse before they get better. That makes me sound pessimistic and cynical and I hate that, but it is what I feel. And I really hope that I am utterly wrong.